EXPERIENCE: HOW WOMEN FEEL EVERYDAY

I was walking by the beach, near Bandstand in Mumbai with a friend of mine. As we walked down the promenade I walked on the right side of the footpath- the side where the road was and my friend walked to my left- along the walls.

I was looking at the waves of the ocean reflect the moonlight; simply admiring nature. It was beautiful, the way the waves just splashed against the rocks.

A small white car passed from my right. There were five men in the car and they all seemed to be staring at me with an unrelenting stare. So much so, that their heads turned to stare at me in unison as the car went by. It must have been for 6 seconds but, it seemed like longer.

I had never felt intimidated in that manner by someone looking at me but this was different- their gazes were what you would call cold and perhaps even uncannily sexual- if you can describe a mere gaze that way.

That’s when it hit me! The men weren't looking at me… they were looking at my friend. She was dressed in what you would call fairly conservative attire- not that it mattered to the men who stared.



I had always known what the   infamous ‘Male Gaze’ was, most men actually do. What most of us don’t know however, is how it feels to be at the other end of it. In fact most men will live their whole lives without ever really feeling it. A privelage that comes by virtue of being a man.

At this point I must admit that, I have no idea where I’m heading with this. I might perhaps not have a point at all. Just thoughts that I wish to share- in the hope... that this little post might spark a conversation somewhere.

Anyway, the male gaze isn't something that’s limited to men. Women too judge other women with a mere gaze. You don’t have to say anything- the person being looked at can just tell.

The male gaze however is almost always used with a negative connotation. The warm, complimenting gaze that men give a woman they admire, is also the male gaze.

It’s rather tricky though for a lot of men. I’m often unsure if I can look at a woman I find attractive without making her uncomfortable in certain social situations - its easy to tell when someone is letching but hard to tell when they aren't.

You can subvert such a gaze however! An equally strong look can be effective most of the times. Sometimes a roll of the eyes, followed by an expression of disgust can do wonders.

I was recebtly walking around at a fashion event where I was admiring a beautiful woman. She saw me smiled  in acknowledgement. That was it and it was perfect!

When I shifted my gaze from the pretty, young, smiling woman, I saw a random girl. She seemed to believe that she had ‘Caught Me’. L

I could tell that I was being judged. That’s when I rolled my eyes and looked away as if I had heard her thoughts and they had disgusted me. It worked. But I hate that it was there in the first place.

Liked this post? Also read: Rape Isn't Funny!

Follow me on twitter: http://www.twitter.com/likhnewaala


Like my Facebook page: https://www.facebook.com/Likhnewaala

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

10 REASONS TO GO WATCH TRAPPED

DELHI VERSUS MUMBAI- THE WAY I SEE IT!

SHORT STORY: STORY OF THEIR LIFE

HOW LITTLE THINGS MAKE YOU HAPPY

WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU CHASE YOUR DREAMS?

PK IS NOT A GREAT MOVIE; HERE'S WHY!